If you are not prejudicial
I come from a mixed-non-religious family and have been brought up to appreciate all the worlds’ religions and nations.But living in this part of the world, it has been quite difficult to adjust to the fact that religion=nationality which I was not brought up to believe in.
For me religion is something personal. Something no one should be fighting about because at the end of the day all religions have the same fundamental teachings and believe in a force (God/Allah or any other name) which has created everything on earth and beyond.
They are all based on teachings such as: don't kill, don't steel, be kind, help the poor, don't do to others what you wouldn't want to be done to you etc.
My grandmother is an Orthodox Christian, my mother is a Catholic Christian and my father is a Muslim.
We have survived in our little community as a family thanks to the fact that we all respect each other and each others beliefs. This had, thankfully, never been a serious issue in my house. But marriages are always more difficult and more demanding than the ones of the same religion.
I had a friend once who said "all kids from mixed marriages are messed up" I got very mad at this and don't agree at all. I think I have become richer and more concious about a lot of things or maybe just be the fact that I can get info about the religions first hand.
Questions to answer:
1. Which way is the couple to get married? (church/mosque/the municipality office/other way)
2. What are the children’s names going to be? (are they going to be neutral or something which emphasizes which religion they are)
3. Are the children going to be baptized or circumcised or undergo any other special ritual which is connected to religion?
4. How are the children going to be brought up? What are they going to be taught?
5. Where is the family going to be buried after its’ members pass away?
I have tried reading all the holy books, went to a Pakistani school with Muslims, went to a Church of England school in
I am Muslim and proud of it, but I never intend for my children to be pressured into picking a religion or being religious at all. Just like my parents let me make the choice and let me do my thing.
This has really opened my eyes and made me become more awake to everything that is going on in the world. What for?
8 Comments:
I understand what you are talking about... Greek and christian orthodox go together. Not to mention subreligious segregations that make our life more difficult.
It is about the maturity and ability for dialogue of the persons that can resolve differences or make it a problem, that is why it is usually a problem..
In Hawai'i, I would estimate that more than half of the population comes from mixed marriages so to your friend who suggest mixed marriages create messed up people, I can only offer that friend to visit the islands, spend time with a mixed marriage ohana (family) and he/she will feel the spirit of aloha and love. Messed up people are the results of ignorance, misunderstandings of cultures or intolerance to something we do not understand - but it is this difference that makes humans so interesting.
I read news of religous sect conflict and violence in Bosnia, Iraq, Turkey and Africa, and it bewilders the mind how fanatical and extremist people can be in their religous beliefs and then I start to wonder whether it really is about religion since religion does not say its ok to cause genocide or kill innocent people, so if its not religion, I wonder what is truly deeply rooted in the violence and hatred that fuels peoples anger.
Sorry for the long comment.
Thank you for your comments. I love the fact that people still believe in the goodness and kidness of the human kind.
I don't usually like posting long posts but something inspired me to write about this 'tricky' topic.
are you planning to marry soon or what? :)
anyways, religion is beautiful, but most of the people are practicing it wrongly... concretely for christianity and islam, the bible and kuran can be understood as you want to be... and unfortunately lots of the people on this planet are bad people... also, most of the good people are stupid, so are easily cheated by the bad people... you know what I mean...
I was born and have lived in Kosovo for 19 years, so I know exactly what you mean about the mixed marriages. It is so hard sometimes to be accepted by the society, by te people from both sides... and yeah, kids often have problems because of that... and smartest are those families that let the kid grow up and decide for himself what he wants to believe into... Until then, kid can be taught only the best things from both religions...
don`t know if you had such a chance, but you certainly look like good example of how a kid from mixed marriage in balkans doesn`t have to be screwed up :)
cheers from Istanbul...
I agree that all religions offer valuable lessons and philosophies that are essentially aimed at living a life full of giving, love and kindness. Because of that, I do not practice any one religion or describe myself as one said religion, but prefer to think of myself as a spiritualist...I believe in God, but not in specific religious book's perception/description of whom or what God is. I believe that by being a kind, caring, loving person that tries to better himself and the world around him I am following the correct path to spirituality. To me it's very simple, and very easy to be this way. Ceremony, sermon and history only cloud the way and create rifts and conflict between peoples and sadly, often in the name of religion.
Hahaha.. and no, I am not planning on getting married soon... not yet :)and when I do get married, religion, I hope, will be the least of my troubles.
I will never let something like that effect my life :)
Pleased to greet you, Marili. You are well traveled, open minded and not bashful for a yound woman.
Istanbul is a genuine love of mine...and so is Croatia. I've been in Sarajevo a couple of times and bathed in its delicious international climate. I adore its ambiance and the fact that it is close to the goemetric center of the triangularly-shaped Bosnia and Herzegovina.
Take care. And I hope to see you back at windowtomymind.
Religion is to me a personal/family concept. It is ideal and tradition. I don't feel as though I should wield my religion as a club, but rather to have my actions reflect my beliefs. My goal in life and the mantra I repeat to my children(when I'm not telling them to stop that)is to treat people the way I want people to treat me. I belive the flaw of religion as a whole is that it too easily becomes a political tool, and a powerful one. So what started out as the truth becomes deception. What began from absolute love has become the engine of hate.
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